The Devil is in the Details (a disarming little tale)

by milesstoneman

1200px-Seal_of_the_United_States_Congress.svg.pngA Congressional Committee, “The Committee of Public Safety” is in session.  Let’s peek in on them…

Representative Justin Other Kennedy (D) MA has the floor.  “Mr. Chairman” he shouted.  “I am sick of the gun violence in this country.  My constituents want me to ‘do something’.  I propose a that we pass a new law against mass shootings.”

“Hear! Hear!” came the approval of the members.

“I propose that we make it illegal for anyone in this country to kill another person using a firearm of any kind, especially military-style ones.  And,”  he added, “we can make it illegal for criminals to possess any guns to begin with.”

A murmur of approval passed around room.  Every one of them was up for reelection in 2020, and the voters were all demanding that they “do something”.  A new law was just the “something” they needed.

Representative Most Lee Bull (R) OK rose to his feet.  After being recognized by the chairman, he began.

“I’d like to propose an amendment to that law,” he declared.  “I propose that if anyone murders more than one person with a firearm, that they be subject to multiple penalties, one each for the persons killed.”

“Yes!” arose the shouted approval from the committee.  “We must do something!”gun reform

The committee droned on for some time, each one adding something to the legislation which would outlaw murder and Make America Safe Again.  (Some one suggested that they could all campaign with that slogan on a hat, or at least MASA on it.   However it was squashed after someone pointed out that the hat might offend some long-time Democratic voters.)

Suddenly, a bright light flashed all around them, and a thick cloud enveloped them.  There was the unmistakable smell of methane in the room.  A man wearing a red suit red suitstepped out of the cloud.

“Sorry about that,” he said, with less than true contrition.  “I had Taco Bell for lunch.”

The Representative from Virginia was sure there was a Santa Claus.

Representative  Bragg (D) NY peered at the Congressional credentials hanging around his neck. The name read “Bill Z. Bub”

Rising to her feet she asked the unannounced guest, “Excuse me, Mr. Bub, but are you a Democrat or a Republican?”

“Independent,” he replied.  “I always caucus with the Democrats, but I’m willing to extend a hand across the aisle to any Republican who is willing to work with me, and most are.  Just call me Bill.”

Bill motioned with his hand for quiet and then began to speak.  “I was listening to your ideas, just now, and although I commend you for wanting to ‘do something’, I would like to point out that everything you’ve suggested is already law.  And it hasn’t Made America Safe Again.  You need a bold plan.  It’s time to disarm everybody.  No guns, no murder.  Make sense?”

A wave of assent was spreading around the committee room when Representative Ima Lyre (R) TX jumped to her feet.

“What about the second amendment to the US Constitution?” she asked.  “Won’t that stop us?”

Bill just smiled.  He had been handling leaders like this for millennia, and subverting the rule of law through them was child’s play.

“Look,” he began.  “You merely have to publicly tar the second amendment defenders asJesus Gun unsafe, religious gun-nut hicks, who are in the pocket of special interest groups like the NRA and who don’t care about the deaths of innocents as long as they get to keep their guns.  Once the public understands, they’ll be ready to repeal that amendment.  And you can always tell them, that despite repealing the amendment, that if they like their guns they can still keep their guns.  That lie, or one like it has worked before, it will work again.  Besides, are we going to let some law written by long-dead old white guys continue to be responsible for these tragedies, or are we wanting to Make America Safe Again.”

Bill continued to make his pitch.  He spoke at length about the plans he has for the future, when the whole world will be under one government, a European-style government.  And, he promised, the world will be able, then, to implement the final, final solution to the Jewish problem.

Hearing that Bill had a final solution to the Jewish problem in mind, Representative Omar Al Ka Bong (D) MN shouted “Hallelujah!”

But Representative Wanna B Shur (R) KY stood to his feet.

hitler“I don’t want to be casting aspersions, Bill, but haven’t you promised that a few times before?  How do we know that your new ‘leader’ will be more successful than the last few you’ve picked.?”

Bill wasn’t rattled.  “I nearly had it the last time,” he began.  “The only thing that stood in my way was the entrance of the US into that big war.  And US citizens still had their guns, and knew how to use them.  In fact, I had disarmed Great Britain earlier, but the NRA put out a request during the first part of the war, and US gun owners sent thousands of firearms to the UK to help them fight my guy.  Once I totally disarm the US, that won’t be a problem the next time.  What do you say?  The voters want us to ‘do something’.  And this will really be something.  Something big!  Are you with me?”

Committee members of both parties excitedly began to discuss the process of disarmament.

We’ve seen enough, I think.  Let us leave them to their discussion.

The most important thing for you to know about all of this is that your right to self-defense is built into the universe by the God who created us.  And, therefore, your right to use the tools most likely to succeed in your bid to defend yourself and your family, is unassailable, whether or not a government ‘guarantees” it on paper or not.

Never give up your guns.  Just say no.  Hide them if we enter bad times, and hang on for better times.  Your guns are just about all that stands between you and liberty.